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 Thanks note to Dad
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Posted on 06-20-10 5:46 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Dear Dad,

Thank you!


Ø Thank you for paying 1/4th of your income for my elementary school fee when you had a wife and 3 more kids to feed, educate and shelter. I don't know how you did it? I guess I was too young to know.


Ø Thank you for buying us new clothes for Dashain and wearing that same polo shirt you had been wearing for a couple of years. I still remember how you looked that Dashain. I guess I was too busy to show the new dress to my friends and relatives that I never asked you if you liked to wear that faded shirt.


Ø Thank you for bringing that used HERO bicycle that I had wished for my 11th birthday. I guess I was in such a hurry to ride on it, that I didn't even bother to ask you how many hours of overtime you had to work to pay for it.


Ø Thank you for not leaving me alone for a single moment for a whole week when I was admitted to the hospital to cure my typhoid. Did anyone ask you if you were ever tired/sleepless? I didn't.


Ø Thank you for not traveling to see your sick dad so that you could save up the expenses for that first TV we wanted in our living room. Did you get to see your dad in his final days? I guess not, you were too broke to even call him.


Ø Thank you for smiling and hugging me when I said, "I hate you" for not buying me an 80 cc bajaj scooter when all of my friends were riding on Hero Honda Splendor. Were you really smiling? I guess not. Then tell me why did you go to your room and sob? I saw you dad.


Ø Thank you for sending me off to Kathmandu University for my intermediate studies, when I could've joined Tribhuvan University with fewer expenses. Do you have enough funds on your pension account now? I guess I wouldn't know unless you tell me dad.


Ø Thank you for not letting us know about your everlasting back pain so that you didn't have to go to the doctor. Does it still hurt? I guess so, because the only time I know you went to the hospital was when I was admitted for typhoid.


Ø Thank you for those tears you shed when you found out I passed my intermediate exam in first division. Are you still proud of me? I guess all parents are proud of their kids.


Ø Thank you for sending me abroad for my higher education even though I knew you couldn't afford it. Did you pay off your debt yet? I guess not. You are retired and you don't have any pension fund left for your so called golden (?) days.


Ø Finally, thank you for thanking me for my achievement. Let me ask you dad, do you think it's worth devoting your past, present and future for your kids? I guess I won't know unless I have my own kid(s).


source: I found this note in sajha long time ago. whoever posted this, thanks..

Posted on 06-20-10 6:04 PM     [Snapshot: 10]     Reply [Subscribe]
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thnks for sharing...one of the most touching article  i ever encountered in sajha...

Posted on 06-20-10 6:12 PM     [Snapshot: 20]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Your Article has a very good Flow..

Happy Fathers day to mine as well. I called but forgot the reason i called home. Certainly i would be calling back and wishing him happy fathers day and let him know that i am very proud of him..


Posted on 06-21-10 3:18 PM     [Snapshot: 181]     Reply [Subscribe]
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* *
Last edited: 13-Aug-10 07:16 PM

Posted on 06-21-10 4:56 PM     [Snapshot: 212]     Reply [Subscribe]
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@Boulevard Dreams
Nice repost .. I read this in the last father's day .. Thanks for reposting it again 

Posted on 06-21-10 6:22 PM     [Snapshot: 239]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Posted on 08-12-10 10:15 AM     [Snapshot: 389]     Reply [Subscribe]
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I have seen this msg dozen of time in many forum, emails, and FB. Every time I see, kind of guilt spike on my heart. However, I am not even close to the son as described in this msg. As far as I recall it correctly, I had never put my parents in a bad situation that I should feel guilty. Interestingly, early this summer, I read this paragraph to my father when we were together...........and saw smirk on his face. Importantly, I am myself a father now.
Posted on 08-12-10 11:54 AM     [Snapshot: 491]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Very touching, except for the crying part I guess... a little too softy. But nonetheless a great piece.

Thanks for the repost, reminds me of a story posted in Sajha on the same topic, tundikhel or something like that about guy saluting tundikhel remembering his dad. Something like that.

Posted on 08-12-10 1:04 PM     [Snapshot: 551]     Reply [Subscribe]
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From my side- Thank You for leaving my mom when i was young. That gave me a huge opportunity to understand hardships and gave me enough power to suck it up. It could not have happened without you being so jerk at that time. Thank You!
Posted on 08-12-10 1:55 PM     [Snapshot: 574]     Reply [Subscribe]
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The above message to Dad (of OP's) is simply awesome.  I  respect my Dad, but unfortunately, I do not have the same feeling as you. We used to have  different views, and a kind of conflicting environment in home all the time. My mom glued us together somehow. I wanted to show the above piece to my Dad once, but I did not, because:

1. My dad paid almost nothing for my education. I studied in government school and the most expensive monthly fee I ever paid was Rs. 40 in grade 9/10. Before that it was under Rs. 25. My school fee came from my mom's pocket, who used to save some money by small household earnings (sahuji harule diyeko unbata  sweater bundine, batti kaatne, dhuup banaaune, sahuji harule diyeko kaagaz ra patrikaa lai kaatkut paarera bhatko maad tasera  thailaa banaaune, masalaa packing garne, ropaain ra aru kheti kisaani seasonmaa jyaami kaam garne, etc.) I was too young but I understood the hardship of my mom, and I tried to help her as much as I could.

2. We never bought new clothes for festivals. Our new clothes used to come on the birthdays.  Dad  spent for the clothes, foods and shelter but I never felt he had to struggle hard to meet those demands.

3. I wanted a bicycle, not a new or used one but to learn riding it. My friends got money for renting a bicycle, if they did not own. They learnt riding bicycle at young age but I did not. I used to feel isolated when my friends had bicycle and I had to walk.  Dad brought a phoenix bicycle from his office after my SLC, but I could not use it, because I did not know bicycle riding until then.

4. When I was sick, my mom and sisters took care of me, often with traditional and ayurvedic medicines. Once Dad took me to hospital after finding that the traditional and ayurvedic medicine were not helping much for me. After the diagnosis in the teaching hospital, the Doctor, Dad and myself were shocked to know that I had a serious health problem. Dad did everything he could do in my treatment. I could return to normal life after the treatment, however, there was a feeling of regret not to pay enough attention to a growing kid.

5. I had to fight hard with my Dad and threaten to leave house before making him agree to buy a TV. I was surprised that he agreed to buy a color TV and a japanese VCR player too, whereas I was expecting he would agree to buy only a 12-inch b/w TV. I knew, if he wanted he could afford.

6. I joined  "cheap" Tribhuvan University, where I also won tuition fee waiver. I remember, I just paid the admission fee. I don't remember if I ever bought a new book (either in school or college). I used cheap notebook (30 pg Eagle brand) mostly. I hardly bought a second notebook for one subject in the entire year. I hardly did any homework that needed volume of stationary supplies. I never got chance to join private tuition.  I have spent pocket money while outing with friends, and could not buy books or stationary for which I got the money. I once found a huge dump of used receipts (bills) thrown away by some businessmen. It had carbon print on one side and the other side blank.  I used those papers as my notebook for many years.

7. I got a job during my college days. I needed to run between college and work. I needed a bike so badly. I decided to get a bike and asked my Dad, but he refused because I did not have a license. One friend helped me learning bike riding. He did not show up on the day of my license trial exam at Tinkune. He had promised to come, but he was stuck in some other important business. I begged one person who just finished his trial successfully. He was a good man and agreed to help me by lending his bike for my trial test. I took a few laps for practice but I failed in the trial. I then fought with Dad and made him agree to finance 50% cost of a bike, but the condition was, I have to pay the rest. Back in those days, we needed to pay full in cash to buy a bike. No finance, no bank loans. I had hard time fulfilling the condition.

8. My Dad wanted me to study his subject, which I did not do. Anytime, whenever I share some of my hard times in study with him, he used to say - it is your field that I know of nothing. If you had followed my suggestion, you would have never faced that sort of hard time. It just made me more angry.

9. One of his friend had predicted that I would fail in the SLC exam. He congratulated me the first time when I passed the SLC.   After SLC, I graduated from different colleges, worked different places n experienced ups and downs. Many my friends and their parents applaud my success but it never made my Dad happy again. Well he used to say "Good", "I am happy", but I know he was not as happy as I saw him when I told him my SLC result.

10. I got scholarship to study abroad. It was a full scholarship. My only expenses were on preparing a passport and application document. It is hard to remember now, but I think, I did not pay for a visa either, and they provided me air ticket and pocket money too. My Dad did not even ask about the stuffs and preparations I need to do before leaving the country. It was about 30 minutes ago before getting out of home, he came to ask me if I need anything. I was too busy to talk and greet friends and families who came to see me off at home and to finish some unfinished tasks. I think, I could not even care what he said me there. He came to the airport, and told me to take care of my health.

Dad gradually started to realize how hard is it to raise a child when he learnt what other parents have done to their kids. After I left country, my siblings joined a private college, and my Dad had to pay regular tuition fees, and other expenses. Also, Dad had to handle additional social responsibilities that I used to take care of, which made him exposed to many other practical and social stuffs. I sometime feel, he now has realized that his parenting style was not so good. He does not talk to me as other Dads talk to their kids. I mean, he hesitates to disagree with me, which sometime makes me feel sad. Perhaps, I would love better the same stubborn and strict Dad.

Most of my Dad's friends were lavish with their living habits when I was a kid. I always thought we should be able to afford the same, but my Dad always told that he could not afford. I do not know how other families could manage the money or if they had other sources of income. I once asked about it, and Dad told me that those families are descendants of RANA and Kaji khalak, who have owned plenty of ancestral properties.  We do not have that.

Most kids of my Dad's friends are in foreign soil (USA, Canada, Aus, EU etc.) today. Unlike my Dad, they have spent huge to educate and to send them out of country. They keep bragging about their kids success and establishment in foreign soil. My Dad does not like talking about kids and family, but I recently knew that Dad talks proudly whenever someone ask him about me.

I think, Dad gave me a hard time for a reason. Many of my friends and colleagues ended up in drug-addiction whose parents were fulfilling their desires easily. I perhaps learnt to survive the adversity and find my own ways in life. I am happy what I am now. I am afraid if I share the above piece to my Dad, I would be hurting him. I do not want to hurt him.

Last edited: 20-Aug-10 10:59 AM

Posted on 08-12-10 3:26 PM     [Snapshot: 655]     Reply [Subscribe]
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He have done enough for you and   at this time he wants to be proud by saying that look my son/daughter had done this for me ...not that ki my son/daughter never come to visit me .


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