My Racist Encounter at the White House Correspondents' Dinner

Seema Jilani

Physician reporting from Afghanistan
 

The faux red carpet had been laid out for the famous and the wannabe-famous. Politicians and journalists arrived at the White House Correspondents' Dinner, bedazzled in the hopes of basking in a few fleeting moments of fame, even if only by osmosis from proximity to celebrities. New to the Washington scene, I was to experience the spectacle with my husband, a journalist, and enjoy an evening out. Or at least an hour out. You see, as a spouse I was not allowed into the actual dinner. Those of us who are not participating in the hideous schmooze-fest that is this evening are relegated to attending the cocktail hour only, if that. Our guest was the extraordinarily brilliant Oscar-nominated director of Beasts of the Southern Wild, Benh Zeitlin. Mr. Zeitlin's unassuming demeanor was a refreshing taste of humility in a sea of pretentious politicians reeking of narcissism.

As I left the hotel and my husband went to the ballroom for the dinner, I realized he still had my keys. I approached the escalators that led down to the ballroom and asked the externally contracted security representatives if I could go down. They abruptly responded, "You can't go down without a ticket." I explained my situation and that I just wanted my keys from my husband in the foyer and that I wouldn't need to enter in the ballroom. They refused to let me through. For the next half hour, they watched as I frantically called my husband but was unable to reach him.

Then something remarkable happened. I watched as they let countless other women through -- all Caucasian -- without even asking to see their tickets. I asked why they were allowing them to go freely when they had just told me that I needed a ticket. Their response? "Well, now we are checking tickets." He rolled his eyes and let another woman through, this time actually checking her ticket. His smug tone, enveloped in condescension, taunted, "See? That's what a ticket looks like."

When I asked "Why did you lie to me, sir?" they threatened to have the Secret Service throw me out of the building -- me, a 4'11" young woman who weighs 100 pounds soaking wet, who was all prettied up in elegant formal dress, who was simply trying to reach her husband. The only thing on me that could possibly inflict harm were my dainty silver stilettos, and they were too busy inflicting pain on my feet at the moment. My suspicion was confirmed when I saw the men ask a blonde woman for her ticket and she replied, "I lost it." The snickering tough-guy responded, "I'd be happy to personally escort you down the escalators ma'am."

Like a malignancy, it had crept in when I least expected it -- this repugnant, infectious bigotry we have become so accustomed to. "White privilege" was on display, palpable to passersby who consoled me. I've come to expect this repulsive racism in many aspects of my life, but when I find it entrenched in these smaller encounters is when salt is sprinkled deep into the wounds. In these crystallizing moments it is clear that while I might see myself as just another all-American gal who has great affection for this country, others see me as something less than human, more now than ever before.

When I asked why the security representatives offered to personally escort white women without tickets downstairs while they watched me flounder, why they threatened to call the Secret Service on me, I was told, "We have to be extra careful with you all after the Boston bombings."

I explained that I am a physician, that my husband is a noted journalist for a major American newspaper, and that our guest was an esteemed, Oscar-nominated director. They did not believe me. Never mind that the American flag flew proudly outside of our home for years, with my father taking it inside whenever it rained to protect it from damage. Never mind that I won "Most Patriotic" almost every July 4th growing up. Never mind that I have provided health care to some of America's most underprivileged, even when they have refused to shake my hand because of my ethnicity.

I looked at him, struggling to bury my tears beneath whatever shred of dignity that remained. They finally saturated my lashes and flood onto my face. Shaking with rage, I said, "We are all human beings and I only ask that you give me the same respect you give others. All I am asking is to be treating with a dignity and humanity. What you did is wrong." They stared straight ahead, arms crossed, and refused to even look at me. Up came the cruel, xenophobic, soundproof wall that I had seen in the eyes of so many after 9/11. Their eyes, flecked with disdain and hatred, looked through me.

The next affront came quickly thereafter. "You were here last year, weren't you? You caused trouble here last year too. I know you," they claimed, accusing me of being a party-crasher. Completely confused, I explained that this was my first time here and that I had no idea what he was referencing. Clearly, he had assumed all brown people look the same and had confused me for someone else.

I wonder what their reaction would have been to a well-dressed white woman trying to reach her husband. Would she have struggled for over an hour while they watched and offered to escort others in? Would they not have extended an offer to help, bended over backwards to offer assistance, just as they did with the woman who "lost her ticket"? Would the Boston bombings even be mentioned to a white woman?

Let's stop this facade that we are a beacon of tolerance. I don't need you to "tolerate" me. I don't want you to merely put up with my presence. All I ask, all I have ever asked, is to be treated as a human being, that bigoted jingoism is not injected into every minute facet my life, that there remains at least the illusion of decency.

Despite being a native English speaker who was born in New Orleans and a physician who trained at a prestigious institution, all people see is the color of my skin. After this incident, I will no longer apologize, either for my faith or my complexion. It is not my job to convince you to distinguish me from the violent sociopaths that claim to be Muslims, whose terrorism I neither support, nor condone. It is your job. Just like when a disturbed young white man shoots up a movie theatre or a school, it is my job, as someone with a conscience, to distinguish them from others. It's not my job to plead with you to shake my hand without cringing, nor am I going to applaud you when you treat me with common decency; it's not an accomplishment. It's simply the right thing to do. Honestly, it's not that hard.

This year, Quvenzhané Wallis took the world by storm with her staggering performance in Beasts of the Southern Wild. At several award ceremonies, reporters refused to the learn the accurate pronunciation of her name, and one reporter allegedly told Wallis, "I'm gonna call you Annie," because her name was too difficult to pronounce. If reporters can learn to pronounce Gerard Depardieu and Monique Lhuillier then surely they can take the time to learn how to pronounce Quvenzhané. It's not hard; it's just not deemed worthy of your energy because she is someone of color.

A school child recently threatened my 12-year-old niece claiming, "I'm going to kill you Miss Bin Laden." Again, it is not my job to teach your children manners and social justice, to remove the disgusting threads of racism that you have woven into their hearts with your insecurities. Last week, a 39-year-old Muslim American cab driver who served in the Iraq war was attacked and had his jaw broken in a hate crime. The assailant, an executive from an aviation company, told the veteran "I will slice your [Disallowed String for - bad word]ing throat right now." I suppose the "support the troops" rhetoric by the right only applies to white veterans.

It wasn't enough that I have had to prove my "American-ness" at every step of my career, but now the next generation is suffering as well. It wasn't enough that I was asked whether my father taught me how to make bombs, or that I was told that I was doomed to the seventh circle of hell during my medical school interviews. I was also asked whether I would wear a burqa or if my parents would arrange my marriage during interviews. It is outrageous that I have to actually prove to the world how horrified I am that an 8-year-old boy was brutally murdered by a terrorist bombing. Any normal human being feels this agonizing grief with the rest of the country. I do not have to prove to you that, I, too, find it morally reprehensible. Of course I do. I have a heart. I am human.

So, I no longer want a seat at your restaurant, where you serve me begrudgingly, where I am belittled for asking for food without pork, where I endure your dirty looks at my hijabi friend. I want my pride intact, I want this struggle of mine to be recognized, for you to look me in the eye and acknowledge that yes, this tumor called bigotry is indeed rivering through your veins, polluting your mind, and is so malignant that it compels you to squash my dignity.

It's the little indignities that slowly devastate your soul. The ones where your guard is down, and you just expect to dress up, look pretty, and enjoy an evening as a newlywed, or at the Oscars, but instead end up humiliated and snubbed. The ubiquitous racist slap in the face is thinly veiled just beneath the carefully crafted façade. This filthy, highly infectious plague is transforming our nation into one of unwarranted suspicion and anguish inflicted on disenfranchised, voiceless people of color. And now, it is no longer my job to enlighten you. To quote what you so often tell ethnic communities, "It's time for you to step up to the plate, take responsibility, and stop taking what I have earned," my integrity, my dignity.

 

Anneji,

There are political movements now in Europe againsts immigration. It is minority but slowly white people are getting tired of immigration and in the future i am sure this will get bigger as multiculturalism shows its ugly colours. But thankfully it is the white people themselves who are voting these people out. But for how long?.

I do not believe in racism. You focus on these small issues you tend to highlight these problems and make them bigger than it really is. USA has anti discrimination laws made by white people which is strong. For me there is no such thing as racism, just normal human behaviour. I prefer not to focus on it and ignore it. Rather than be a cry baby and go suing people and making use of laws put by white people to be used responsibly. It just tends to make people politically correct for fear of getting sued. It does not change the heart of a person.  

Freedom2012..wisest person in sajha...I've become your big fan

अरुलाई पर्दा ठीक्क पर्यो भन्ने बानी मलाई राम्रो लागेन, आफुलाई नपरे सम्म बुझ्न गार्हो हुने रहेछ |

Freedom your thinking is inherently flawed and wreaks of inferiority complex when you say that white people are a superior race. If you believe they are superior to you then you must be bowing down to them all the time. You already bow to christian god, I guess you will bow down to any white person since they are superior to you according to your own statement.

You say  "I come from a country where still today if your father is a DSP or minister you can break the law, even rape , rob and steal. I have got nothing to show that i come from a progressive country. So why should i fake it?."

There is no need to fake anything. Maybe you are a faker faking your religious belief and bowing down to another human being just because of his color but in reality, you do not need to fake anything. You just realize that you are a human being and if there is inherent problem with some practices you can make a statement that such a thing is wrong. There is nothing wrong with accepting that raping, robbing, stealing is bad.

You talk as though powerful white people do not break the law and get away with it. You talk as though white people do not rape, rob and steal. How lowly human being are you to bow down to another race. Don't you have any sense of personal pride as a free and educated human being? 

According to your asinine logic, if you come from an Arab country where girls cannot even go to school, then you would find no problem with some fanatic arab father killing his own daughter in the US because she seems to be wayward to her religion. So you would say he shouldn't fake it. Right?

You have accepted that you took up christianity in another thread. In this thread you have accepted that the white race is superior to you. मलाई त यो नाथे नेपाली हो कि होइन भन्ने संका लाग्न थाल्यो| तिमि नेपाली त हौ? कि भारतीय अथवा क्रिस्टियन एजेन्ट हौ?  नेपाली हो भने नेपालीमा जवाफ दिने कस्ट गर्नु नत्र भने बुझ्नु पर्ने सबै कुरा प्रस्टै छ|

 

Wow, I am very ecstatic to see such a mind-boggling sensitive and great post after a very long time.

Before I talk about my opinion, let me share what just happened today.

Since my passport was about to expire in a month, off I went to the Walgreens to take my passport picture. Shortly after, I also decided to print my graduation picture from my USB drive that the professional photographer took like five years ago.  Then, when I started talking to the white American woman if I could get an 11 x 4 size of my graduation picture, she told me that I could only if I have the permission letter from the professional photographer who took my picture.  Since, i graduated five years ago, I really don’t know the photography company's contact email as it was sent to my college email address which I don’t use it anymore so I told her that I can't provide her perimssion letter or email.

Frustrated and puzzled, I quickly stepped out of the door and drove away. After few minutes instead of getting pissed at her, I started to praise her honesty and integrity. Well it's because of white girl like Amanda and companies like Walgreens, that has made this country great.This is how great America was built and how it got so reputed all over the world. It’s not because the money or the white people, it’s because of the law that separates it from the other countries. It’s because of  the law that prevents whites to openly discriminate you for job, housing or any legal matters. It’s the law that holds people accountable for the actions that you do.

So guys, stop admitting that this country is made by whites so we need to accept racism and proceed with our life. If all blacks would have accepted it till now, Obama wouldn’t have been president nor would most of the players in NBA be black.

Last but not least, America was built by immigrants.  Whites made laws and regulations whereas minority people along with whites worked hard to make this country great, a country of freedom, a country that accepts any religion, color and language.

Peace

Sirus

i think it's all on your perspective. just try to look red color in your apt for 2 hours and you'll see red everywhere. same thing if you think about racism in your head 24 -7 then you will interpret every action/reaction with you as racism. you will feel everyone cutting in front of you while driving is because he saw you were a person in color. anyone who honcked at your same. any cashier who didn't smile at your or greeted you , is a racist and so on and so forth. the fact of the matter is the person who cut infront of you might be just a bad driver or might not be paying attention to the road and not necessarly racist. the person at the register might be not smiling at your because he just got yelled by his boss few minutes ago for not clocking on time etc etc.. at least there is a good , very good system here. i feel lucky and grateful to be part of the system that works and respects everyone , not because who you know and what race you are but simply because you are human. after reading the article i did a basic Google search on her and found her face books filled with comments where white ppl are not treating ppl with color with same. i think she has programmed her brain consciously or unconsciously to just take any actions/reaction involving white ppl as a racist incident. she was in DC,one of the most diversed place in the US. she could be a potorican,

even white , or mixed race. she doesn't even look arabic.. i think she need to unwind and take it easy.. maybe she needs to hear our Nepali song.. phool ko ankhama phoolai sansara, kadako ankha ma kadai sansara...

 I hate to read such s long posts but I did finally but never read others comments. I think she is first generation American n ya if u don't have white skin trust me people judge u by your look. Whites are majority in USA n this country is founded by whites. If u r European u get treated well coz it's hard to differentiate who is American, Canadian or German if u r white. If u r first heneration Chinese- American people will still judge by kungfu n geek persona. If u r black people think u r sex predator gangster hustler etc. if u r hispanics definitely border hopper. If u r Muslim American then terrorists. Common it's simple but other races view white folks as rednecks n racists too. So these sort of things don't bother me nowadays. I don't wana call it racism but little conflicts or clash of cultures. 
       After 9/11 n boston bombing she could have known at the first place that being first generation Arabic American should havd never tried to break the norm by forcefully trying to enter when she didn't have a pass or ticket. I won't blame those securities, what if she really was strapped with bombs n was allowed to enter. So many important leaders including President could have been killed. The reason blondes were let in was have you ever heard any blonde woman terrorizing USA? 
        May be the securities thought she was that white house party crashers Salahis. Salahis couple were everywhere on tv for hitting the party uninvited. So I think nobody breached anything nor the securities nor this writer. Rather, she knew without ticket it's not possible, it was just a car key, she could have walked outside n call the cab n gone home. Even her hubby is in fault not picking up the phone. 

@ Texasranger,

I am humbled, thank you. :)

@Rethink,

If i said someone is better than me, it does not mean that i am implying that i am bad. If i said someone is superior than me, i am not saying that i am inferior. In fact, you have the complex, that is why you see it that way. The most important part for change is to accept the facts. White people gave the world almost everything that we use today in modern life. Right from electricity to aeroplanes to computers, internet, medicines, etc. Not only that, all white countries take refugees, give aid to poor countries and they have created an egalitarian and meritocratic society where people from all over the world love to flock to. They also created the concept of secularism inspite of being christian in origin. So they have proven themselves as superior. Consider this as a student coming First in class with distinctions. It does not mean the other students are inferior but basically the top student gets the acknowledgement and prize.

My logic is simple. To see whether Nepalese are progressive, I do not look at the NRN, i look at the Nepal. To understand indians, i do not look at NRIs, i look at India. China for chinese and Africa for africans and so on and so forth. Somehow, the potential of citizens of all countries gets maximised when they are in a white country. You know why?. Because when you are in superior company, it motivates you and you learn and you think and you innovate. Thus all credit goes to the White people for creating and sustaining such a system. So i am basically acknowledging this fact.

As for racism, i never said it is good. I said it is a normal part of life. I have no issues if someone frisks me 10 times at the airport. It is for our safety. I do not want political correctness in safety. If someone asks me to go back to my country i will say "ok" and stay on. If everyone started reporting racism to their tiny bits then Sir, we will have a daily encyclopedia to read. Unless your life is filled with racism and you are finding it difficult to survive, just move on. Also if someone is racist towards me and i ignore it, i have become more tolerant. It is good for myself, my anger management. Good for my blood pressure. At the end of the month, i still get paid. And mind you, it is more than many whites would get. hehehehe.

This song is dedicated to Gilani. A good way to unwind is to listen to songs. One wishes this world was perfect but it is not. Let us all sing together in unison "Hami Ek Haun".

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qCynhFpZ3hM

Freedom, you haven't answered the last past. If you could do us a favor.

You have accepted that you took up christianity in another thread. In this thread you have accepted that the white race is superior to you. मलाई त यो नाथे नेपाली हो कि होइन भन्ने संका लाग्न थाल्यो| तिमि नेपाली त हौ? कि भारतीय अथवा क्रिस्टियन एजेन्ट हौ?  नेपाली हो भने नेपालीमा जवाफ दिने कस्ट गर्नु नत्र भने बुझ्नु पर्ने सबै कुरा प्रस्टै छ|

Hehehe Rethink bro, just because i disagree with you i am not nepalese?. Kina kati emotional bhayeko?. And I never said that i am a Christian, it is your stupid analysis.

I do not reply to stupid questions which lacks critical thinking. Why dont you focus on topic at hand?. To me it seems you are the intolerant one, always trying to look for a confrontation even when there is none. I can just imagine your life filled with negative thoughts everyday. I have to type in Nepali just to prove my nationality......lolz....and you call white people racist...hehehehehe.

 

Since many of you have already made many comments already i am going to make some as well:

To the moron who said " we come to USA because whites are here"

We do not come here for the whites, we come here looking for an oppurtunity, the oppurtunity means exchange of what you have with the country has. If there was another country run by non whites where there was a better market for your skills we would be there. We come here for oppurtunity that matches us.

To another moron who said " this is normal and it happens everywhere"

Yes this is normal and it happens everywere and most likely it happens more in other places than here. But USA also wants to take bigger credit for being more human rights friendly and when there is a situion of human rights voilence or discrimination, it should be spoken out and a discrimination should be called out and and named as discrimination. Some of you bring your third world SLAVE mentality along with yourself to the first world and never question your "master", the whites in this context.

The muslim girl did nothing wrong by pointing out that she was discriminated. She felt discriminated and she has a right to express it and the civilize world will acknowledge it.

Freedom just like you have every right to stand by your fragile inferiority complex, I have every right to question or be curious about your intentions or nationality. I must congratulate you for being the first person I have come across who says that white people are superior race.

When you say X is superior to Y, then even a 2 year old knows that Y is inferior to X. If you don't believe in that logic perhaps you should not be using comparative adjectives.

Don't get me wrong, I am not intolerant of you but when you make blanket statements like "white people are superior" then it simply shows your defeatist mentality and low down inferiority complex no matter how much you try to hide in under a blanket of examples. Pointing out your fallacy does not make me intolerant! Unless you believe to be all knowing person who is always right.

You have the typical Nepali chamchagiri attitude. When the typical Nepali sees someone who is richer or in higher social standing, he starts to rub his hands together to take out the mayel from his hands in a gesture of devotion, otherwise known as kissing ass, brown nosing. So when you see some white people, you follow your natural instinct to bow down and accept their supremacy and hope they give you something. Otherwise there is no need to consider them superior human beings.

You can respect each individual for their greatness no matter they are white, black, brown, bronze, or yellow.

This thread is about stereotyping and you have stereotyped the white race as superior race. That is the most inferiority complex ridden stereotyping if I have heard any. Each human being has the ability to be great and it has nothing to do with race.

You have pointed out that quite a few white countries have better system, but the system is not inherently attrubutable to their race. There are many variables that affect the socio-political system such as geography and natural resources.

There is no point really arguing about this further because you are hell bent on accepting the supremacy of the white race while considering everyone else inferior. So my suggestion to you is to continue to bow down to the superior race and hope they raise your salary a little bit so you can boast to the other inferior race that you are making more money than the average white race :)

As you know from your Nepalese background, chamchagiri gets you everywhere. You can call me stupid for believing every human being is equal, but you are nothing but  कुइरेको चम्चा!

 You can beat a dead horse as much as you want, it ain't going to bring him back. Let us not side track from the topic. All I'm saying is that I do not buy her story, there are many loop holes that needs to be addressed. White house itself needs to address and tell their side of the story.

Annathaway ji
I say BIGOT, since she is Afgan by heritage and a female and we all know what goes on in Afganistan with regards to women. They get their head cut off for staring at a male. Thank God, she is an white house dinner surrounded by celebrities, living and breathing American freedom. She should consider where her heritage comes from and the plight of human right in Afganistan before she start seeing a lice on someone's head. You can disagree.

Folks, don't make stories out of stories. The main scenerio - she was not allowed inside a ballroom = discrimination.
Please don't make up things like the as if she was told racial slurs and said, "You're a brown skin Afgan and we hate your race". If that happened, then that is blatant racism and she is absolutely right. Some of you are assuming that is what happened. Please go read the article, unless I read something else. I'm not trying to say racism does not exist nor that we should tolerate it. Don't assume things I've not written on my post. All I'm saying is that the story sounds fake and we need to hear both side of the story to come to a conclusion. It is too early and wrong for her to call out racism simply for not being allowed inside. After all, a black president resides and this was a party of liberals. I don't buy it that nobody stood up for her if it indeed happened.
That's all I want to say, you have your own opinion. Some stick with the facts that are on the table, some make it up in their head. Please do not loose your sleep over it.  I'm out. Thanks

Vhotee,

She should consider where her heritage comes from and the plight of human right in Afganistan before she start seeing a lice on someone's head. 
-> I see great injustices and corruption inside our country; according to your logic, nepalese don't have right for justice in any other country because there is injustice inside Nepal.

Folks, don't make stories out of stories. The main scenerio - she was not allowed inside a ballroom = discrimination.
-> Please reread the stories. Her main concern is that she was not treated equally as other people. 

Please don't make up things like the as if she was told racial slurs and said, "You're a brown skin Afgan and we hate your race". 
-> So your definition of 'racism' narrows down to only when racials slurs are used and else it doesn't occur? 

Some of you are assuming that is what happened. 
-> I am not assuming anythingelse, I am simply believing the story she told and I don't think she exaggerated it.

All I'm saying is that the story sounds fake and we need to hear both side of the story to come to a conclusion.
- I don't think the story is fake, and yes, both sides need to be heard.

After all, a black president resides and this was a party of liberals.
- So you mean all the race problems are solved only on that. Based on your logic, I should think that women have more "rights" and "respects" in countries like Bangladesh and Pakistan because they had/have women as their premiers and US has none yet.

@ Sidster,

ahhh, ok you came to USA to eat chinese noodles and watch hindi movies. No matter how much you deny, most of the modern things you enjoy in your life were invented by white people and majority of the people in the world prefer to migrate to white countries.

@ Rethink,

I dedicate this song to you...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I5_BhsgR9G8

"No matter how much you deny, most of the modern things you enjoy in your life were invented by white people......"

he he hehehe


 It was the Chinese who taught your "White people" to use toilet paper instead of using hands to wipe their arse.

It was the Chines who taught your "White People" to use utensils to eat the food instead of using hands.

.... It is the Chinese who still considers the "Whites" as "barbarians".


hehehe  Stupid Pakhe