> > Lesson Number One
> > *************************
> >
> > A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
> > A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I
> > also sit
> > like you and do nothing all day long?" The crow
> > answered: "Sure, why not."
> > So,the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and
> > rested.
> > All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the
> > rabbit and ate
> > it.
> >
> > Management Lesson: To be sitting and doing nothing,
> > you must
> > be sitting very, very high up.
> >
> > Lesson Number Two
> > *************************
> >
> > A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to
> > be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the
> > turkey,
> > "but I haven't got the energy."
> > "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my
> > droppings?" replied the bull. They're packed with
> > nutrients."
> > The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that
> > it actually gave him enough strength to reach the
> > first branch
> > of the tree.
> > The next day, after eating some more dung, he
> > reached the
> > second branch. Finally, after a fortnight, there he
> > was proudly
> > perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly
> > spotted
> > by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
> >
> > Management Lesson: Bullshit might get you to the
> > top, but it won't keep you there.
> >
> > Lesson Number Three
> > **************************
> >
> > When the body was first made, all the parts wanted
> > to be Boss. The brain said, "I should be Boss
> > because I
> > control the whole body's responses and functions."
> > The feet said, " We should be Boss as we carry the
> > brain about and get him to where he wants to go."
> > The hands
> > said, "We should be the Boss because we do all the
> > work and earn all the money.
> > And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs
> > and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up. All
> > the parts
> > laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss.
> > So the asshole went
> > on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.
> > Within a short time the
> > eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet
> > twitched, the heart and
> > lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.
> > Eventually they all decided that
> > the asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was
> > passed. All the other
> > parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and
> > passed out the shit!
> >
> > Management Lesson: You don't need brains to be a
> > Boss, any asshole will do.
> >
> > Lesson Number Four
> > *************************
> >
> > A little bird was flying south for the winter. It
> > was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground
> > in a large
> > field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and
> > dropped some dung
> > on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of
> > cow dung, it began to
> > realize
> > how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him
> > out! He
> > lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing
> > for joy. A passing cat
> > heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
> > Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird
> > under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out
> > and ate
> > him!
> >
> > Management Lesson:
> > (1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your
> > enemy.
> > (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your
> > friend.
> > (3) And when you're in deep shit, keep your mouth
> > shut!
